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Saturday, November 12, 2016

food!!

Talking about food is awkward.  Am I alone in thinking this?  Eating disorder recovery kinda requires discussion about specific things that I'm eating, and that's, well...embarrassing.  I tend to be private about what I eat.  I'm slowly getting better with that.  It helps to have people in my life who are normal and practical about their own food.  I have a pretty good mix of friends that I've been drawing ideas from, both inside and outside of recovery.  They're all getting used to me occasionally drilling them about what they eat.  lol

I eat weird.  Really weird.  For breakfast today, I had a concoction of navy beans, corn, bbq sauce and cayenne pepper.  

I went to the store this morning, intending to stock up on a few staple items that I consider "safe recovery" foods, things that will help heal my body from the damage I've caused with my ED.  When I know the nutritional benefits of eating something, I'm not as likely to succumb to guilt and purge it.

I've trolled the internet looking for ED recovery meal plan ideas and....they all seem so unrealistic and commercialized, and.....perfect.  It's more triggering than helpful.  Lately, I've been trolling the internet looking for food plans and recipes from people who are recovering themselves, rather than ideas from the professionals.  I'm insanely interested in what other recovering ED sufferers eat.  I've toyed with the idea of posting what I eat every day but I don't want to trigger other people.  In the past, tracking my food has been an unhealthy obsession.  I'm starting to wonder though, if I can redeem that obsession and bust through some food shame, while promoting the sharing of ideas.

My safest food foundation has been what I experienced at Tiger Mt. Structure and routine, plus constant exposure to cooking and food preparation that ranged from quick and easy to needing to read recipes.  I also was able to watch how other people ate...people with and without food hangups.

Anyway.  I could ramble on about this forever.  I'm off to troll the internet for more ideas.  :)

3 comments:

  1. I think that's normal. I'm very private about what I eat too.

    For trying to find some semblance of 'normal' eating, one thing I find really helpful is reading through the Dietary Guidelines (I read the Australian ones, but I think each country has slightly different ones). They just helped me get a good idea of what a 'normal' diet is, and it's the same whether you're underweight or overweight or trying to lose or gain or maintain. It's also helped me try to find a balance between the different food groups and an idea of how many serves from each food group I should ideally be getting. Just reading through the literature helped me gain a lot of knowledge as to what (and how much) I *should* be eating.

    xx

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  2. Sooooo many judgments out there about food and what we eat! Makes things a lot more complicated, that's for sure.

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  3. Can totally relate to being private about what I eat...I think it's a guilt thing?

    If you want any advice or support or anything, you know where I am. I can email you my meal plan if that's any help at all? Let me know what I can do to help you through this.

    I think you're amazing. Just keep going. Xoxo

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